Malcolm Noonan (Carlow-Kilkenny, Green Party) | Oireachtas source

Again, I want to acknowledge how important and timely this motion is and to commend the Minister, Deputy McEntee, on her leadership throughout this term of Government. In the past few weeks, we have seen not only one, but two, incredibly courageous survivors of gender-based and sexual violence step up to very bravely go public about their own experiences and once again put a spotlight on this issue in a selfless demonstration of their support of and solidarity with other victims. I simply cannot express my admiration for them and for the strength they have shown while, in the words of Bláthnaid Raleigh, handing back the shame to the perpetrators of the crimes that were committed against them. However, I am conscious too that both Natasha O’Brien and Bláthnaid Raleigh are just the latest in a very long line of women who have had to first live with the trauma and the fallout of experiencing gender-based violence and then in many cases, find themselves retraumatised in pursuit of justice. A number of Deputies have mentioned Lavinia Kerwick here as well and I think of her bravery all those years ago. In the aftermath of high-profile cases like this, we often find ourselves debating the idea of character or the relevance of character references in the context of violent crimes or sexual assault but it really speaks volumes about the character of those women. They have somehow found the strength to make themselves a voice for other victims and to push us all to have the kind of discussion we are having here today.

It is an extension of the conversations that have played out on radio and on social media over recent weeks, and I hope around dinner tables and pub tables and between families and groups of friends too, because domestic, gender-based and sexual violence is reaching epidemic proportions in this country.

We cannot credibly claim to have a zero-tolerance approach to it when we know there were 40,048 disclosures to Women’s Aid last year. Behind every one of those disclosures is a woman who found the strength and the courage to share her story. There may be many thousands more who have yet to take that important first step or seek that support.

For every victim of domestic or gender-based violence there is a perpetrator, and it is too easy for us to dismiss these men as outliers or aberrations. We often, unintentionally, use language that sets them apart from the rest of us. We say they are monsters or they are evil, but those shocking statistics from Women’s Aid of 40,000 disclosures say otherwise. They are people we know, work with and socialise with. They might be friends or relatives, and they need to hear clearly now, that as legislators, as public representatives and as a society, when we say we have zero tolerance for these kinds of crimes, we mean it. Wherever their crime falls on the spectrum of domestic, gender-based or sexual violence, we will not tolerate it.

As a society we all bear a responsibility deliver that message. As men we bear a particular responsibility. Our first responsibility is in acknowledging that. We need to stop insisting we are not part of the problem and start asking how we can be part of the solution.

I want to mention one case that I know we will all be familiar with. It is 12 years since Jill Meagher was raped and murdered in Melbourne and in those 12 years her husband, Tom, has become an incredible advocate for all victims of gender-based violence. He has written powerfully on this idea of "the monster myth", saying that in aftermath of Jill’s murder he experienced an incredible outpouring of love and compassion. However, the more he felt the incredible support from the community, the more difficult it was to ignore the silent majority of victims whose tormentors are not monsters lurking on busy streets, but their friends, acquaintances, husbands, lovers, brothers and fathers.

He has said “In the war on women, this man exemplifies the extremist wing of the hateful and pervasive ideology of male sexual terrorism, but it’s the everyday spectrum of male violence that disturbs me even more." He shared a quote from a Canadian anti-violence campaigner, Lee Lakeman, which has always stayed with me:

Violent men... are not yet shamed by the harm of coercive control over women... Maybe we can rest some hope on the growing activity of men of goodwill calling on each other to change. When that group hits a critical mass, the majority of men will be more likely to want to change.

We cannot live in or accept a culture where the male perpetrator of a violent crime against a woman can take to social media to brag about his crime. We must instead shape a culture of zero tolerance. Through honest dialogue and education, we can shape a society where girls and women feel safe from the threat of domestic and gender-based violence. We need to focus on education of boys in schools to deal with the culture of misogyny. We need media responsibility and create a culture and infrastructure where women and girls can feel safe to come forward.

In my city of Kilkenny, our joint policing committee in March revealed that 126 incidents were reported from January to the end of March this year compared with 330 incidents in the whole 12 months of 2023. That is a really significant increase and the dial is moving in the wrong direction here.

Carlow is still awaiting a domestic violence refuge, meaning that victims there are referred to Kilkenny, Waterford, Tipperary or Wexford. Thankfully, the Minister has confirmed this year that a refuge containing eight family units of accommodation is planned for Carlow. I commend the campaigners who have worked hard to get that resource, and the work of Amber Womens Refuge in Kilkenny. I think of my friend, the late Susie Long, who was involved in its establishment. A new counselling centre, Acorn Lodge, has just been opened. It is a wonderful empathetic caring service for women and families servicing a much wider hinterland.

I commend the Taoiseach and the Minister, Deputy McEntee, on their leadership on this matter. I agree with the Taoiseach that it is not nor should it be a whole-of-government response. It is all of us here. It is all of society. We need to stand up collectively and collaboratively against gender-based violence.

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