Ms Mary Harney:

In truth and reconciliation, it is often said that we deserve the truth. At least, that is the core of what truth and reconciliation commissions are about. Without that truth, as Senator Gallagher said, we cannot move forward. I am 70. My mother is dead. My uncle, who was also institutionalised, is dead. I am the last of the line, as it were. I have two half-sisters but I am the last of that particular family. When I first held my birth certificate in my hand, I jumped up and said that I am someone. Until that point, I did not know because my name had been changed when I first went in there. It was then changed back again. I was told that my mother was dead and it was a lie. We were lied to and now, when we try to apply for our records, many barriers are in our way.

We are the ones who had to be psychoanalysed before we went to the redress board and who had to get testimony from doctors. I had to go to a doctor who had to say how my nose was so battered and how my jaw is the way it is. They kept asking if I was sure I was not in a car accident. I was not. I was beaten. We all go through that, trying to find out what happened.

I ended up in hospital with a kidney complaint when I was about five years of age. There is no record of that. There is no record of the woman who fostered me going to the county for money to support me. There is no record of me being in my first school. These records have gone and we do not know where. I have searched. I wonder about other records and I wonder, when I ask the people whom I went to see, how Ireland is not a nation destroyed by fire. I cannot tell the committee how many records offices had fires in the 1950s. We do not know where the records are.

My mother died not knowing a lot about her past. We had this healing bond of me knowing and getting the information. We were a strength to each other. We were not very close because a mother's bond with a two and a half year old baby cannot be put back once the baby has been taken away, but relationships and memories that are healthy can be created. I have one photograph of me when I was five. If we were to go to a party where we were asked to bring our baby photographs, we could not because we do not have them. Our memories were wiped for us and we are now asking if we can have them back.

I am currently applying to the Residential Institutions Redress Board, RIRB, for information. I accept that I have to go to a solicitor to prove who I am. The most important document that I have to produce for the RIRB is my utility bill. Every time we apply, we have to have a utility bill. What does that prove? What is it about? These are the kinds of nonsensical barriers that are put up. This redacted information was given to me because I asked why the ISPCC officer came to take me away from this woman who had fostered me and took me to court. I do not know what happened and I will never know because it is redacted and I will not get it back. We are referred to as "it" in some of these documents, with questions such as how long a person has had "it", when asking about the child. The questions also ask if the child is illegitimate. We have to look at all of these things, if we ever get any information. Please do not traumatise us any more. Please let us have our records.