Marian Harkin (Sligo-Leitrim, Independent) | Oireachtas source

When I spoke on the family referendum in the Dáil a few weeks ago, I agreed that we need to widen the definition of the family in the Constitution to include, for example, one-parent families, non-married families, grandmothers and grandchildren and so forth. Like many others who spoke in the Dáil that day, who were mostly women I might add, while supporting the aspirations of the amendment, I had considerable difficulty with the term "durable relationships".

Relationships are complex and unique. One person's idea of a durable relationship might be living together for a year or two to see how it works out. The understanding of what is a durable relationship is hugely influenced by a person's expectations, hopes, beliefs and dreams. It emanates as much from the heart and gut as it does from the head. One reporter writing in a daily newspaper said:

I’ve been in a number of durable relationships. Only two of them ended in marriage. Did I love the other people in those relationships? Sure. For those years of commitment. Would I attest to it in a court? At the time, yes. Now, no.

Therein lies the difficulty. When durable relationships end, what happens to the rights of the adults and children in that family and if there are several durable relationships, how are rights adjudicated? Now the State is stepping in and without any legal framework is according the status of family to all durable relationships, which is fine. However, the very least we owe ordinary men, women and especially children, is some kind of legal framework under which they will have some protection they can rely on for their rights and protections as a family. For example, how can people say to Revenue that they are in a durable relationship, in a family, and that they want the same tax treatment as other families? If Revenue objects, will they have to go to court? Will Revenue just say it is fine? How can people have clarity about succession rights and claims to property ownership if the status of their family, based on a durable relationship - this is crucial - can only be decided retrospectively by the courts when there is a dispute. These are real, everyday issues that people are bringing up with me and I have no answers other than to tell them they may have to go to court.

See this speech in context